I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
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