Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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