wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Randomize
