Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize
