Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
