I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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