i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I'm too high and old for this...
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
