bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
