Kiss
Puke
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Randomize
