I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
