He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
