This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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