isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
