it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
