Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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