I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
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