I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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