I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
