i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I believe in your delicious
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Randomize
