you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
