youre lurking in front of me
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
