I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize