You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
