Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
