Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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