This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
and she was petting her beer can
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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