I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
