i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
