I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize