Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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