...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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