she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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