That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
