he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
