i barfeds in our rink
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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