she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
