Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
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