idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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