p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize