Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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