is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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