Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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