I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
