Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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