i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
