I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
