Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
