can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
