I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Randomize
