I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
